Retinoblastoma II

Retinoblastoma, this post is more than 7 months old. I tried to explain something that is hard to understand when you are going thought it and not any easier to understand when you look back. There are so many things I found out about retinoblastoma ever since I posted that post, that I would either have to edit it or write a new one, so I decided to do the latter.

One thing I didn't know about this decease is that it is fatal if it is not treated promptly and with expertise. In most cases it also appears with children aged 1 or 2 my brother was already pretty old to be diagnosed, being 6 years old.

it is never easy for children to go though all those medical examinations, having someone draw your blood for examination. Neither is it easy for parents to deal with the fact that your child has some form of cancer and you have to decided who you trust with the treatment.
Honestly I think it was even harder than that for my father because he realized that he had gone through the same thing when he was too small to remember, and that it was something hereditary. Of course it is not my father's fault that the decease broke out with my brother, it is no one's fault, and there is nothing anyone can do about it,

Technorati Tags : retinoblastoma

How you end up in the military in Austria

Having brothers can have an interesting effect on one's life. One of them is, if you live in Austria, that at age 17 each of them will get a letter to come to a local military post, where they will have to go through a phyiscal and mental examination. My youngest brother just went through that last week. The reason for that is, that every male Austrian has to serve in the military for 6 months I(Information in German). You also have the option to go for Zivildienst for 8 months, which are mostly jobs where you are doing something in the social sector, like working for the red cross or at nursing homes and similar institutions.

 

Linked at Mudville Gazette

Technorati Tags : Military, Austria

 

Mothers?

I don't know if that is just my family, but since some of you who are reading my blog here are mothers yourself, maybe you can explain, why mothers always seem to have the feeling that they should know about every detail in their children's lives? Even being an adult, which I would say I am.

 

• When do I have my dentist's appointment?
• Which dentist do I go to?
• Is my room tidy?

and the list goes on and on. Not that I am not willing to share things about me, I just find it kind of annoying to have to report everything....

Sad story...

Through a German forum about Germany who have immigrated to the US or are in the process of doing so I found this website which is about the sad process of the son of a deceased US soldier who wanted to live with the American part of his family but was denied the US citicenship. Anyone who is willing to help, Ralf is going to appreciate it greatly!

 

Reply to Comments

thanks for your comments!

 

Ladylily: thank you for so much faith in me, it means a LOT to me, to know that there are people out there who belive I can achieve all that although I tend to not belive it. I have to admit that even the thought of achieving everything I want can be kinda frightening, but I guess, life is frightening no matter what and if it is not, it is bound to be boring... well, just my thought...

 

Square1: I like your answer that you perfer to think how you would like to live... somehow that seems to be something I am afraid of though don't ask me why, I think I might just be scared of failing at getting there , and so I don't want to expect much cause I don't want to be disappointed or disappoint others.

 

Yankeemom: the thing is that I have not really seen anything  that kept me getting up each morning lately that I was looking forward to... sometimes I think it is my fault others I think that's just the way it is... well that's my reply to all this...

 

Where is this life heading?

Hmm, today I had several things that made me think of the content of this very post.

 

First I started reading at One To The Nth Power Square1's most recent post which made me think a lot about myself, because several things she was writing about are things I know very well myself, like having a hard time to communicate with people who are around me all the time, whereas it seems much easier to me to talk to people I barely know, and to tell them how I feel and what moves me or upsets me. I know I am in a different position than she is in, simply because I am not married, I am not even in a relationship, I don't have kids who need me.

 

The second thing that made me write this was caused by my very shallow sleep last night, that gave me the feeling I had not slept at all, the only reason I know that I did sleep was that time passed more quickly than it would have if I had been awake... when I woke up to get ready to work I turned on the computer to wake up, and a friend of mine I chat with on a regular basis was still up so we started a conversation, and I told her of that night, and she asked me if I was stressed by something. Not that I was aware of, but then the thought, that I don't really know what I want of my life, and that as soon as I come up with something that I might really want, something that would get me all enthusiastic, I ask myself, if I really want that, if I could really get to that point, and if I even got there, what then?

 

I know these questions are not necessary at all, since I stop myself from ever getting where I might want to be. This all sounds real pathetic to me when I talk about it, but for some weird reason I have not found a way to deal with that problem yet...

• Should I just go for whatever I feel the strongest urge for?
• Or should I find out the reasons why something seem appealing to me? And even if I do so, is this going to help me find out what I really want to do?

One thing I know is that I have to get some more discipline into my life and get myself more organized. This is one of the things I am aware of. But sometimes I feel like I don't see a reason to get my life organized, when I was working as a nanny I was pretty good at keeping my own life and the life of the family I was working for as far organized as it was possible in my position.

"Does your family hate Americans?"

One interesting experience, I would like to share with you here: Most of you who read my blog here know that I have been supporting American troops for a bit more than a year. And one of the recent questions I get when we get to know each other enough so that we would call each other friends is: "Does your family hate Americans?" The first time I heard this question I have to admit I was kinda shocked. Why should they hate Americans? I, and my family, don't like or dislike people because of where they come from. There is so much more to each single one of us that makes us special. I think I also would have to say in that context that for me there is no such thing as a typical American, just like I believe there is no such thing as a typical Austrian, German or Italian. Of course there are things that are more probable to be encountered in some regions and barely encountered in others, but I would like to know how would you feel if I asked you as an American, if your family hated Austrians? Since both world wars had been started by Austrians, it might be the case. I just could not help thinking about all this.

I know, I might not agree with every single one of you on everything, I think the chance that we disagree on several things is pretty high, but still I respect your points of view as long as you respect mine. I might tell you my point of view if you say something I don't agree with, but that would not mean that I hate you or want to change you.

I just somehow got the feeling that a lot of Americans seem to have the feeling that Europeans in general would not like any Americans. One thing that is true, is that many Europeans don't like President Bush, and I have to count myself among them, whether you like to hear this or not, but in this very same sentence I also have to say that I don't like the Austrian chancellor Wolfgang Schüssel either. That doesn't make me hate Austrians. I just believe that there is more to people than their political views and than who they would vote for...

Linked to  The Mudville Gazette and Basil's Blog

Technorati Tags : USA, Austria, politics, friendship

 

Christmas time - finally over...

Well, Christmas break at university is over, and I am back at school. When the break started I had planned to relax a bit, read some books and stuff like that. Nothing like this happened. My mom broke her left arm just the first day of my break, and a few days later she got also sick with a pretty bad cold. I had been expecting to spend this last week before Christmas with getting lots of baking done, but somehow I had to do that all by myself, with my mom not being able to do stuff like that, and if she had to go somewhere I had to drive her, as she was not allowed to drive. Oh I forgot my grandmother, who always comes to my parents' house on Christmas Eve and invites the family to her place on Christmas Day. But since she is 86 she is not really capable of getting a full meal for 6 people ready, so it was my job to help her with that. And at the same time I had to be at work Mondays to Fridays at 7 am. For some reason I just don't feel full of energy, ready to be back at school and work at all! I just feel like sleeping, like I would need to hibernate, someting humans usually don't do....

Well, those temperatures outside, being below freezing aren't really making me want to go outside right now either. This morning it was like -12°C (which is about 9°F) when I was heading for work, and my bed was so nice and warm... Can anyone relate?

blogging block?

I know I have been away from the blogging world for a while, but I guess I am back again. And reading other blogs just keeps me having so many thoughts, that I would like to share, but don't find the time to do so, and when I sit down to finally write them down, I don't really get anywhere, LOL

Might be just that there is too much on my mind to write, that I can't focus on one thing. All just sorry excuses I guess for not being inspired to write, but I will do my best to write on a regular basis though... I guess I just had a blogging block...

Rant...

Well, this day started out pretty bad already... when I had to get ready to be at work at 7 I found out that one of the fuses of the apartment was off and when I had turned it on, I realized that the light bulb of the bathroom had had it. By that time I just had to run to get there in time. Then my co-worker kept telling me to hurry up. Well when I finally got the chance to use the bathroom (not something you would say you would have to wait about an hour for) I found the floor wet already, and when I tried to flush, I found out the toilet was clogged. Fun, right?

Well,  sorry for this rant today, but I just needed to! Feeling a bit better now, so maybe a better post tonight...

Happy new year!!!!!!!

Well, since I have been quiet for so long, I decided with the first day of 2006 I should get back to writing again on a more regular basis, and having borrowed a computer for my apartment I will be able to take care of that from home as well....